Dating Women - Starting Dating Women Or Men Again
Author: Allan Tan
It's not always easy to start dating. It's particularly difficult if the ending of your last relationship was painful or if you were in a long-term relationship that ended. For divorcees, dating women or men again can be especially difficult at first. When it's time to start dating again, it's important to make sure that you're ready. The only way to do that is to prepare yourself and learn why the last dating relationship – or marriage – didn't work. Take Care of Yourself Before you start finding women you're interested in dating, you need to know you're ready. Give yourself the time you need to be ready to look for someone new. Rebounding will hurt you most of all. Sure, the women will be hurt, but you will be most of all. They'll know you rebounded, and you'll be left wondering why the dating relationship didn't work out. Figure Out What You Liked – And Didn't Like One of the worst things some men and women do themselves is they fall into the trap of dating the same type of person over and over again. People who have been in abusive relationships fall into this trap easier than most people, and continually date people who show the same outward signs of abuse. One way to stop this from happening is to evaluate your previous relationship. Consider: *How did your previous partner affect how you view relationships? *What are some things he did or said that you liked? *What aspects of her personality did you like – sense of humor, financially savvy – did you like? *What things about that person do you not want in another dating relationship? Was he an alcoholic? Was she abusive Abusive? Sexually demanding or uninterested in sex? Financially dependent on you or another family member? A cheater? Unorganized? Messy? What other things bothered you? *What have you learned from your last dating relationship? Get Involved Before you start dating, remember who you are, what you like and how you ended up where you are. Spend time with old friends or make some new ones by taking a class at a community college or community health center. Make sure you're not dating different women to fill the void left by your previous partner. The only way to do this is to recognize that you have a life and are a complete person apart from that individual. When you meet women you're interested in and might want to start dating, date out of mutual interest, not so she will make you feel less lonely or less sad. Deal With the Possibility of Rejection Chances are good that before you start dating women (or men) seriously again, you'll have some flops. That could mean a relationship that lasts just a few weeks or just a few months. It could mean a one-night stand. Yes, it might feel a little like high school, but you'll eventually get past that. Put the Past Behind You If you're ready to start dating women again, the thoughts about how you hate all men or all women won't surface. They're the same gender, not the same person. You can't judge all men or all women because of what happened in your last relationship. Not all men are cheaters. Not all women are cheaters. Not all men will take your money and leave you. Not all women will expect you to pay for everything. Remind yourself that this is a new relationship and a new you. As you go out there and get back into the wide world of dating, be yourself and know what you want. Try new things and meet new people. Give yourself a second chance. Date new women and meet new people. If it doesn't work, try again for however long it takes.
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/dating-women-starting-dating-women-or-men-again-966634.html
About the Author:
Allan Tan is an experienced writer on seeking dating and relationships. He has been writing for many years and has had many articles published. Some of Allan's most favorite topics to write on include single professionals, mature daters, relationships, dating women , and matchmaking. Allan's articles are well written and memorable. They are especially great for anyone looking to begin dating and still keep up with their daily activities.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
How To Ask A Girl Out On A Date and NOT Get Rejected
How To Ask A Girl Out On A Date and NOT Get Rejected
Author: Alex Coulson
How to Ask a Girl for a Date ----
It's the most intimidating question a guy can ask a woman, and one that I get asked about regularly. It feels like such a risky proposition, putting yourself out there for a woman's approval (or rejection.) ----
This has to be one of the questions I hear most frequently from guys. Why? It's the most intimidating question a guy can ask a woman, and one that I get asked about regularly. It feels like such a risky proposition, putting yourself out there for a woman's approval (or rejection.) The answer to the riddle is this: STOP asking women out!
First of all, you're starting a program in a woman's head that says: "He's romantically interested in me. That means dates, and awkward kisses, and possibly sex, and then a breakup like the last one. I better not."
Second, by asking her out, you make a woman need to figure out if she's attracted to you the moment you ask the question. She is presented with an opportunity which requires her to figure out her interest level in YOU.
You see, a woman doesn't want to lead a man on, but she also rarely knows right away if there's romantic interest. So she'll say yes just to test you out. It's like her first drive of a new car. She doesn't want to be obligated to buy right off the bat. If you push her for an answer right away (which is how asking her out comes across to her) she'll say No, even if she isn't sure yet. Most women are NOT attracted to you immediately unless it's by your looks alone. If you rely on pure sex appeal to win you the one you want, you'll be relying on "luck." There's a much better way.
Don't move so fast on her. Be patient. (Oh, and another fringe benefit of not asking a woman out is that you can't be rejected. Pretty cool, huh?)
Take a moment and think about which of these would be most interesting to a woman:
A) A meal and/or movie date that demonstrates no originality, and implies that she'll have to be considering you romantically, and that there will be pressure for her to be "on," and then after it's all done, she'll have to deal with your attempt to kiss her. Scary.
B) A chance to go out and have some fun, with no pressure.
Which one sounds better to you?
Now, if you're still leaning towards Option A, think about which one sounds better to HER? Does Option B sound better now? You better believe it does.
Now, it may not seem to have your interests in mind right away, but that's not what winning a girl's heart is about. It's about forgetting what YOU want for long enough so that you can give her what SHE wants.
Let's put it this way - would you invest $10,000 of your hard-earned money in a stock you'd never even heard of before? No way! You'd want to see what the company is about, check out the fundamentals. And THEN you might be willing to invest a few hundred or so.
That's what it looks like to her - potentially BIG risk, and no guarantee of return.
There's a saying: "You can have anything you want in this world if you just help enough other people get what they want."
Also, Option B gives her a little MYSTERY about your intentions and your interest, and that is what a woman wants. Remember: hope + doubt = passion.
So now that you've figured out that you need to give her a lower investment option to start out with, how do you do it exactly?
Easy. If you've only just met her on the street, you should see if she's got a minute for coffee or tea at the local coffee shop. Take the opportunity to build a little rapport and show her that you're FUN. The rest will come later if you can demonstrate a laid-back, fun personality.
If she doesn't have the time, you then shift into a lower gear and get her phone number and/or email address. After you put such a nice request out there for coffee and she turned you down, she's more likely to agree to give you her contact information, and in most cases she will write it right down.
If she hesitates, which is very likely because you're still essentially a stranger, then you need to reassure her by teasing her. That's right, teasing her.
HER: "Sorry, I don't give out my number." YOU: "It's okay, I'm only going to leave you a hundred messages on your machine. C'mon, write it down." Make her feel a little silly that she doubts your integrity and character. Teasing makes her forget about her weird trust issues. Hand her a pen and paper and don't look her in the eye; just wait. The next person who speaks, loses.
Usually, she'll write it down. You have to be willing to wait out that long, uncomfortable silence while she figures out if you're a confident guy or a wimp. If you start talking and trying to reassure her of all the reasons she should feel okay about giving you her information, you've already lost.
Just act as if she could do nothing else, and she will do exactly what you want.
Once you have her contact information, you only need to get hold of her and invite her to complete the offer you originally made - tea or coffee at a certain local shop. It's a low-investment, and it's not too pushy or overtly "romantic" that she has to worry about where things have to go.
----------------- Carlos Xuma is a well-known expert in the dating-seduction related field and an author of bestselling titles such as "Secrets of the Alpha Male", "Approach Women - NOW!" and "Alpha Immersion". Click here for more information on Carlos Xuma: http://www.alexcoulson.com/2009/06/alpha-man-immersion-dvds-discount-promo.html
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/how-to-ask-a-girl-out-on-a-date-and-not-get-rejected-962606.html
About the Author:Alex Coulson has been a core leader in the ever evolving dating industry, he holds cutting-edge dating workshops/courses every weekend around Australia and regularly holds dating seminars on attracting women internationally.
For more information and to claim access to Alex Coulson’s “5 Step System” Audio E-course for FREE (limited time only) head over to http://www.alexcoulson.com
Author: Alex Coulson
How to Ask a Girl for a Date ----
It's the most intimidating question a guy can ask a woman, and one that I get asked about regularly. It feels like such a risky proposition, putting yourself out there for a woman's approval (or rejection.) ----
This has to be one of the questions I hear most frequently from guys. Why? It's the most intimidating question a guy can ask a woman, and one that I get asked about regularly. It feels like such a risky proposition, putting yourself out there for a woman's approval (or rejection.) The answer to the riddle is this: STOP asking women out!
First of all, you're starting a program in a woman's head that says: "He's romantically interested in me. That means dates, and awkward kisses, and possibly sex, and then a breakup like the last one. I better not."
Second, by asking her out, you make a woman need to figure out if she's attracted to you the moment you ask the question. She is presented with an opportunity which requires her to figure out her interest level in YOU.
You see, a woman doesn't want to lead a man on, but she also rarely knows right away if there's romantic interest. So she'll say yes just to test you out. It's like her first drive of a new car. She doesn't want to be obligated to buy right off the bat. If you push her for an answer right away (which is how asking her out comes across to her) she'll say No, even if she isn't sure yet. Most women are NOT attracted to you immediately unless it's by your looks alone. If you rely on pure sex appeal to win you the one you want, you'll be relying on "luck." There's a much better way.
Don't move so fast on her. Be patient. (Oh, and another fringe benefit of not asking a woman out is that you can't be rejected. Pretty cool, huh?)
Take a moment and think about which of these would be most interesting to a woman:
A) A meal and/or movie date that demonstrates no originality, and implies that she'll have to be considering you romantically, and that there will be pressure for her to be "on," and then after it's all done, she'll have to deal with your attempt to kiss her. Scary.
B) A chance to go out and have some fun, with no pressure.
Which one sounds better to you?
Now, if you're still leaning towards Option A, think about which one sounds better to HER? Does Option B sound better now? You better believe it does.
Now, it may not seem to have your interests in mind right away, but that's not what winning a girl's heart is about. It's about forgetting what YOU want for long enough so that you can give her what SHE wants.
Let's put it this way - would you invest $10,000 of your hard-earned money in a stock you'd never even heard of before? No way! You'd want to see what the company is about, check out the fundamentals. And THEN you might be willing to invest a few hundred or so.
That's what it looks like to her - potentially BIG risk, and no guarantee of return.
There's a saying: "You can have anything you want in this world if you just help enough other people get what they want."
Also, Option B gives her a little MYSTERY about your intentions and your interest, and that is what a woman wants. Remember: hope + doubt = passion.
So now that you've figured out that you need to give her a lower investment option to start out with, how do you do it exactly?
Easy. If you've only just met her on the street, you should see if she's got a minute for coffee or tea at the local coffee shop. Take the opportunity to build a little rapport and show her that you're FUN. The rest will come later if you can demonstrate a laid-back, fun personality.
If she doesn't have the time, you then shift into a lower gear and get her phone number and/or email address. After you put such a nice request out there for coffee and she turned you down, she's more likely to agree to give you her contact information, and in most cases she will write it right down.
If she hesitates, which is very likely because you're still essentially a stranger, then you need to reassure her by teasing her. That's right, teasing her.
HER: "Sorry, I don't give out my number." YOU: "It's okay, I'm only going to leave you a hundred messages on your machine. C'mon, write it down." Make her feel a little silly that she doubts your integrity and character. Teasing makes her forget about her weird trust issues. Hand her a pen and paper and don't look her in the eye; just wait. The next person who speaks, loses.
Usually, she'll write it down. You have to be willing to wait out that long, uncomfortable silence while she figures out if you're a confident guy or a wimp. If you start talking and trying to reassure her of all the reasons she should feel okay about giving you her information, you've already lost.
Just act as if she could do nothing else, and she will do exactly what you want.
Once you have her contact information, you only need to get hold of her and invite her to complete the offer you originally made - tea or coffee at a certain local shop. It's a low-investment, and it's not too pushy or overtly "romantic" that she has to worry about where things have to go.
----------------- Carlos Xuma is a well-known expert in the dating-seduction related field and an author of bestselling titles such as "Secrets of the Alpha Male", "Approach Women - NOW!" and "Alpha Immersion". Click here for more information on Carlos Xuma: http://www.alexcoulson.com/2009/06/alpha-man-immersion-dvds-discount-promo.html
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/how-to-ask-a-girl-out-on-a-date-and-not-get-rejected-962606.html
About the Author:Alex Coulson has been a core leader in the ever evolving dating industry, he holds cutting-edge dating workshops/courses every weekend around Australia and regularly holds dating seminars on attracting women internationally.
For more information and to claim access to Alex Coulson’s “5 Step System” Audio E-course for FREE (limited time only) head over to http://www.alexcoulson.com
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